First visit to the ENT – Sept. 27

On September 27 (Brooke’s 5th birthday) I went to see my ENT because my hearing in my right ear hadn’t seemed quite right for several weeks. I assumed it was related to the many sinus issues I’ve had in the past, but thought I should have it checked out. My ENT, Dr. Ayre, chatted with me, conducted a reflex test on my eardrums and a hearing test and found that my hearing in my right ear was significantly below normal. He seemed very concerned and started to talk to me about maybe having fluid on my inner ear but said it was more likely that I had a tumor behind my ear (between my brain and my ear) called an acoustic neuroma (AN). He started talking about an MRI, the fact that I wouldn’t recover the hearing I had lost and that I may lose it completely, treatment options, etc. I was in shock and my mind started to whirl in a million directions. My father and my grandfather both died of brain cancer so my mind went directly to that. Dr. Ayre reassured me that this wasn’t brain cancer and that these tumors were always benign. I was happy to hear that but, of course, was not convinced.

I left his office feeling numb. It was like I was having an out-of-body experience – this couldn’t be my life right now. I called Jeff from the parking lot of the clinic and told him “They think I have a brain tumor,” and I just started to cry. That was a terrible thing for me to do because he was at work. Can you imagine getting that phone call from your wife while at work? Not my best move. Jeff came home early that night, and I tried to refrain from completely freaking out while we took Brooke out for pizza for her fifth birthday. Everything seemed surreal.